A rant.
May 16, 2008 by jamboree
Reproduced with kind permission from an awesome woman who posts on one of my forums:
I’m getting really tired of all the “rules” women are supposed to follow to be seemingly presentable in public. It’s not just what’s been said in that thread, it’s everything, everywhere. It’s not good enough that your hair is clean, it shouldn’t be thrown into a ponytail or up in a clip, because that’s lazy. Sure, you showered and smell alright, but are you wearing make-up? Are you wearing make-up that covers your blemishes and highlights your eyes and gives you the appearance of being fresh-faced and young? Your lipstick should last all day, you know; by the way, you should wear lipstick, gloss or chapstick isn’t enough. Have you plucked your brows? How about your crotch, is that hairy? Take care of that, because if for any reason you need to remove your panties, you want your poon to look pretty. Shave your legs, and while you’re at it, tan them. Oh you don’t have time to sit in the sun? Use the bottled shit. Don’t go too overboard though, or else you’ll look orange, and that’s also bad. How nice are your clothes? Do your shoes match your outfit, and do they have 4 inch heels? Are your nails painted in a pleasing shade? Do they match your toenails? Don’t show your toe hair! You need this wrinkle cream. And this under-eye cream. And hey, how about some Botox? Or this cream that’s like Botox without the surgery? Because old people are ugly, you know. Wrinkling isn’t cool. Dye your hair! Nobody wants to see that gray shit. Don’t dye it the wrong color though, or you’ll look trashy/punky/cheap. Lift your boobs! Not that high, you slut! Wear this body-shaper to keep your tummy and love handles in check, because fat people are disgusting.
Whatthefuckever. If you don’t like something about the way I look, don’t fucking look at me.
“Whatthefuckever. If you don’t like something about the way I look, don’t fucking look at me.”
LOL. Love it.
The woman tax is indeed exhausting … where’s my woman stimulus check?
This is…yeah. Pretty much exactly how I feel.
I want a woman stimulus check.
Okay, why am I have dirty thoughts?
Hair clean: check.
Nothing stuck in teeth: check.
Clean clothes: check.
Clean face: check.
Husband who married me for my looks (and other things) with blemishes, barefaced, tennis shoes, sports bra’ed, unplucked, unpolished, creamless: Perfect.
Coincidentally, those are the standards he holds for himself. We’ve never talked about feminism, double standards, what have you because his reaction isn’t “wow this is serious something should be done women should be equal” his response is “duh.”
He’s also the slightly artistic sort who think the flaws are what make people interesting. Though fatal flaws are to be avoided.
I like the way I look. I don’t wear make up. I wear shorts and tee shirts all the time. I shave my legs once a week. If you don’t like the way that I look, don’t look at me. I think I look great for my age. I love the definition in my legs and I’m going to show it off all summer in my Bermuda length shorts. My mother still thinks I should wear make up and do my hair. I’m too busy living to spend time fussing over the way I look; besides, that isn’t my style. Being clean and wearing some light perfume is enough for me to feel sexy!
That’s so right. Oh dear. (Surfed over from Shapely Prose via the Fatosphere. Hi!)
Gah, exactly. One thing that I’ve run across once in a while is the notion that fat women, especially, need to make sure to always look good in public, so that we don’t contribute to the slovenly stereotype. To which I say, fuck that. I don’t owe anyone anything when it comes to how my body looks.
Thank you, thank you, thank you! When will we stop pretending that men and women have an equal playing field? A man in one of my women’s studies classes once said, in response to what I considered some consciousness-raising talk in regard to leg-shaving, makeup-wearing, and hair-dyeing, “Yeah, well bees do mating rituals, so it’s natural…just shut up and do it!”
Obviously, not a clever fellow…but how many clever fellows are thinking that? “Just shut up and do it!”
This is why I’m a feminist…
Amen to that! I don’t do any of those things either. In fact, when I read that Lillian shaves once a week I thought that was a lot.
I have consistantly refused to shave a damn thing on my body in about fourteen years…and back then it was legs only, once in a very blue moon. Bodies are hairy. I like ‘em that way.
I like to look nice, but I sometimes think my standard isn’t much like the one society as a whole tends to use. That’s okay. I like how I look. Mr. Twistie likes how I look. If anyone else has a problem, it’s theirs, not mine.
Of course it can take both stamina and excellent luck to march as consistantly to a different drummer as I do. But really, if you’re shaving your nether regions just in case you wind up in public without your knickers on, it’s probably time to stop. Only do it if it really floats your particular boat.
Oh, and I never wear makeup. Mr. Twistie hates the taste of lipstick and I love to kiss Mr. Twistie.
This is great!
I’ve always looked at these as social guidelines. I don’t think I’m required to follow all of this (and I don’t!).
When did ponytails become “wrong”? And most women don’t wear makeup anyway! I might be at a disconnect because I’m only in college, but maybe that is the problem. As women get older, they start trying too hard. Instead of looking younger, maybe people should start being younger. Do the things you need to do but have fun. Be who YOU want to be.
“Live the life you have imagined.” –> Thoreau
This is awesome! I’m going gray. Now. Gray!! Surprisingly, it’s only my mother who objects.
The last line reminded me of a scene in Marjane Satrapi’s “Persepolis” and made me laugh almost as much.
The best takeaway point for me in this was - what? other people have toe hair too?! I’m not actually part hobbit, just human?!
So thankyou.